Vendetta always warned me that Taylor was a bit crazy. Even on our first date, Vendetta warned me that Taylor was bi-polar and that she would eventually attack. This happened to Erin, who one day was staying at the house when Vendetta said she was leaving for a second and that Taylor was going to come over. Ethan thought, ok, that’s fine, but when Taylor actually got there, she immediately went upstairs and confronted Ethan. She said that Ethan shouldn’t be there when Vendetta is pregnant and that he needed to contribute more to the house. Ethan didn’t say anything, because he was in shock. He didn’t want to make anyone mad, because he was a guest and he hadn’t paid rent, because he ran out of money. That was a big concern, but Ethan spoke to Vendetta and Vendetta said that it was ok that he didn’t pay now, but that he had to pay when we got his financial aid in January.
After Taylor attacked Ethan, she went online and attacked me via Facebook. I was upset, because I didn’t know this was such a big problem, but I took care of it ASAP. Taylor seemed remorseful after my strongly-worded email. She also asked me to change my password, because she knew that Vendetta was going to read my messages. I later found out that Taylor’s remorse was anything but the truth, because she was spreading a lie behind my back. She my actions to her family and Vendetta even though this was exactly what they wanted. Either you want the roommate or not. Make up your mind. Now, with $400 less a month coming in, where were we going to make up the difference? I added the email below:
Fwd: Diego fb message from last Dec.18 -2, 2013
|Aug 1 (3 days ago)|
———- Forwarded message ———-
From: Taylor <Taylor.@gmail.com>
Date: Tue, Jul 29, 2014 at 10:45 AM
Subject: Diego fb message from last Dec.18 -2, 2013
To: Vendetta <Vendetta@Vendetta.com>
I’m not sure what anyone else thinks this message “says” but here are some of my concerns:
- Samantha was shocked to receive such a note. At Thanksgiving, she had casually asked about their future plans to live together. The things he said about Vendetta below were not on that topic and made Samantha very uncomfortable to be included in an un-asked-for Group FB message and read accusations (stated as fact) about her niece.
2. Diego, who wants to help people double their business profits, etc, said he was surprised (“In August, to my surprise, we were losing $937 a month…) regarding his finances, just days after starting his new job.
3. The majority of this message seems to be a running list of his sacrifices – like skipping meals, walking to work in freezing weather to save on gas (isn’t it a mile or 2?) . Is this a sympathy move?
- He used phrases “chastised by the family”, “and bullied by my wife” – as factual statements – again, making it awkward to read, as if he is again, to gain sympathy.
- Another opinion that he stated as fact, ‘ The sad part is you’ll never believe me no matter what I say” – is seemingly an insult to me, or yet another ‘poor me’ ? 6. His choice to get drunk on that night was due to his counselor’s advice to have fun with friends in order not to become depressed later.
After reading through this again, I had decided not to continue my comments on this email at this time, even though there are more. Overall, I think it shows that while he was quick to point out that a comment I made was false, he continued in this message to make false statements, especially those that are clearly his opinion STATED as fact.
18 December 2013 21:25
P.S. Samantha is CCed on this email due to her concern about why I’m not living in Charleston. Plus, the whole extended family has only one side of the story, so I have to defend myself from everyone’s judgment. To answer your question about me forcing Vendetta to take a roommate: You and I both know that you can’t make Vendetta “do” anything. So that statement is false. In August, to my surprise, we were losing $937 a month. To remedy this situation, I proposed the following options: 1. I get a second job (+500 per month), 2. Vendetta gets a roommate (+400), 3. I live on the Blacks porch (+600), 4. Vendetta cuts back on her employee hours (+500). I let her pick which choices she wanted to pursue. She picked getting a roommate and she helped me to live with the Blacks, here in Atlanta. At that point we were stable. Between then and now, I’ve been on the phone with every banker in Charleston and every student loan consolidation company nationwide. I’ve also read Diego Ramsey’s and Clark Howards books, made my own lunch (and otherwise skip meals) to save money, walked to work in freezing weather to save on gas, and met with Larry, our financial consultant to figure out how to make ends meet. When our child is born, we will be plus $616. To add to the drama, my employer was going through job cuts, which would have sunk us financially. Armed with “all” the information, which choices would you have made? If you want me to get a second job, I’ll promise you that I’ll whistle to work as long as I’m not chastised by the “family (incl extended)” and bullied by my wife. Now that we are on the subject, let’s talk about why I’m not in Charleston. I make five times Vendetta’s salary and I live in a place (to save money) where ants crawl on me at night (see list above for other cost cutting measures). If I move to Charleston, I will make 1/2rd of my current salary (if I’m lucky) and we would “lose” 3,900 a month. In six months, we’ll be bankrupt. If Vendetta moved to Atlanta – as unbelievable as this sounds – we’d make an extra $500 a month. Crazy!!! That’s because I can rent out the Shelmore housing unit for more money than what Vendetta contributes to our expenses every month. She lives there, because we made a decision “as a family” to keep her close to her support network. I made the sacrifice to not only live like a college student, but also work till midnight every night, so that could have her dream home. Did I mention that I drive ten hours a week to Charleston to spend time with her? As happy as I am to do those things, having her yell at me every weekend and threaten divorce is a significant demotivating factor. Concerning your comment about me drinking / drunk a few months ago, I went to a counselor that very morning and the counselor stated that always being the scape goat for my wife’s anger just to calm her down will eventually put me into depression. She said no matter what to maintain a positive attitude, have fun with friends, and try to pretend that every interaction with Vendetta will be positive. With that advice, I invited Vendetta to hang out with us and she said “Yes!”. I bet you didn’t hear that part of the story. While waiting for her to get dressed and come downstairs, I found her playing on Facebook. I said we had to leave and she got very mad (thus, making me run for my life in fear of her temper). Talk to Ethan or the neighbor for verification of this story. As far as Ethan goes, it was Vendetta’s choice to keep him around. She stated to me that if she kicked out Ethan, she would not get paid for November or December. Ethan promised to pay her in January and thereafter. To prove that her choice is strictly her choice, I don’t benefit from Ethan’s payments. Vendetta doesn’t contribute anything extra to family expenses, she pays 2,000 a month no matter what happens with Ethan. Ethan’s payment goes straight to her, NOT ME. Ethan is Gay, by the way. Concerning Ethan staying over after the baby is born. This is more contentious, because she never, ever, ever stated that this was an issue. Since Ethan is broke and trying to actually finish school and make something of himself, after many delays. This option is more charity versus financially beneficial. I also always state my opinions in a question format with people who need a velvet approach; therefore, I would said “what do you think if Ethan stays with us until we finishes school?” It’s her choice. The decision doesn’t affect me what-so-ever. In fact, I’d prefer he not live there anymore. Now that I’ve spent time defending myself, let’s switch gears. My wife is stressed, because she is nervous. The things she has done to me are ridiculous, but I forgive her, because she is pregnant. I want nothing more than to go a week without getting yelled at, humiliated, lied about, or told I’m not doing enough. I thought everything was my fault until I got a text message from someone very close to Vendetta who heard her yelling at me. That exchange went like this: Other person: “Do u want me to come get u” Me: “No. I’d rather be alone right now.” Other person: “Ok, I’m sorry all that is going on with ya’ll” Me: “:-(” Other person: “Honestly Diego… and I know it’s probably weird hearing advice from me and I’d rather Vendetta not know… but I think no matter what u say or do you’re going to be wrong. Even though you aren’t. And I don’t think anymore can convince her otherwise besides a therapist.” I always blame myself first, so this message was a complete surprise, but it saved me from being depressed and it helped me to gather the strength to continue to fight for our marriage. The sad part is you’ll never believe me no matter what I say. At least you gave me the courtesy to defend myself. Thank you, Diego
19 December 2013 12:06
Have I cleared everything up? Am I still the bad guy?
19 December 2013 14:19
It’s dangerous to assume, you know!
I think being sick is also dangerous! Note to self- dont write emails when you’re hurting.
Ok. Perfect. I’m glad I can clear everything up.
21 December 2013 18:57
Ethan is out. Please bring these matters to my attention sooner. See image.
What is the pic supposed to tell? (Other than he’s not there) I’m missing something here perhaps.
The bedroom is clear. That’s all. He sent me four pictures of the different areas of the house that are now empty of his stuff. The place now belongs to Vendetta exclusively. No more guys in close proximity.
I have to get back to work. Let me know if there are any other issues that need to be sorted out.
I told Vendetta about the email and she was dismissive and told me her mom was crazy and not to listen to her. She seemed awkwardly aware of the email exchanged and just a little contrived, as if this was her plan all along. I only found out later that she was use to turning people against each other to get her way. Vendetta even had me thinking that Ethan was stealing the toilet paper from the bathroom. Truth was Ethan never used toilet paper; he preferred wipes. Vendetta, unconvinced, hid toilet paper in her room at night.