story_image_narcissismOn several occasions after Vendetta got pregnant, she would say that our relationship was only about business. This was definitely her view, but it was not mine. The only time Vendetta was nice to me was when I was working on her business. She was nice because she saw the value of my efforts, and she didn’t want me to stop making the business more money. I later learned from her family that they diagnosed Vendetta with NPD, which by definitions means you use people for your own benefits. Vendetta was using me to build the photography business, but it didn’t become clear until I falsely told Vendetta that I was done working on her business.1 She threw me away faster than a smelly diaper. The change in her mood was extreme and quick.

Mike, my business partner and developer friend, helped to build several websites for Vendetta. After I told Vendetta that I was done building her websites, she immediately stopped being nice to me in the very few occasions that we spoke. She was 100% mean every day, all day, in every conversation. Mike sent me an email one day saying that Vendetta was trying to do some business thing and that she needed help because she was messing it up. When I read it, I knew Vendetta was making a mistake, but after Mike sent it to me, Vendetta got pissed at Mike. Vendetta was essentially trying to cut me out of all business matters. By this time, she also had the advice from her attorney, that by me being such a big part of her business, she would have to give up some ownership in the company in the case of divorce. This was the first time I really saw how Vendetta treated myself and others. She used people in the most heartless ways to advance he own agenda. First it was the business, then it was to get pregnant, and lastly, to accumulate money despite my begging. She even used Donna, when Donna’s boyfriend correctly petitioned for Vendetta to give Donna a raise. Vendetta delayed giving Donna a raise, so Donna quit. She eventually came back after Vendetta agreed to give her a big raise. Good for her. These themes would persist throughout the divorce proceedings as Vendetta tried to cut me off from seeing Lauren, tried to take my mother’s retirement, and passed rumors around Charleston about me. I’ve never met a person that was so heartless.

These were not isolated instances. Vendetta is known for cutting people out of her life when they stop being useful. In my case, it was when she got pregnant, but she kept me around long enough for the health insurance to pay for the pregnancy and for me to transform her business. For Eliot, it was after they bought a house and Vendetta didn’t have to stay with her parents ever again. For business partners, consultants, etc. it was after they confronted her about her behavior.

During the separation, I had many conversations with people. During one conversation, this person said that a crazy looking Taylor walked into his office and told him that Vendetta had NPD. This was the first independent certification, besides Taylor’s own family, to indicate that Taylor knew the whole time that her daughter had a disorder. Taylor was far more guarded with whom she told about Vendetta’s illness versus Vendetta, who used a scorched earth approach and told everyone that Taylor was bi-polar. Taylor… if you play Vendetta’s game, you better come with your best or else she’ll crush you. I used Vendetta’s ability to destroy Taylor’s reputation as a clue for how to protect myself against Vendetta’s attempts to destroy me as well. Rule #1: don’t react rashly.